


Warmth

by Insanelorraine



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Bring tissues, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, no seriously, this is gonna hurt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2020-03-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:14:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23060761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Insanelorraine/pseuds/Insanelorraine
Summary: Kamski never thought he'd fall in love.But now he's coughing up flower petals into a bathroom sink.
Relationships: Elijah Kamski/Gavin Reed
Comments: 9
Kudos: 55





	Warmth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pukner](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pukner/gifts).



> You can blame Pukner for this.

No one would think that Elijah Kamski, world's most eligible bachelor, would have trouble finding love.

No one would think that Elijah Kamski would be coughing up flower petals.

But here he is, on live TV, coughing red petals into his hand. He feels the mood of the room shift before he even hears the shocked gasps. He politely excuses himself from the rest of the press conference before he embarasses himself more.

In the bathroom, hidden away from prying eyes, he lets himself cry. He lets the tears cascade down his face. He looks at the petals in his hand and briefly wonders if they truly are red or if they are stained from his blood. 

He tosses the petals in the trash and washes the blood from his hands. 

Everyone saw what happened. There’s absolutely no way he could cover it up. It was being filmed!

He thinks back to how this came about, to when this all started.

All roads lead to HIM.

The one that started this stupid petal problem.

Gavin Reed.

~

_ “I’m Detective Gavin Reed. I’m here to fuckin… protect you I guess. For the day.” _

_ Elijah looks over at the man who approached him. He’s shorter than Elijah, with brown hair and grey eyes and a scar above his nose. _

_ And a very unhappy look on his face. _

_ “Nice to meet you, Detective. I’m glad to have you.” Elijah says. _

_ “Yeah, well… Don’t fuckin’ get used to it. I’m only here for the day and I’m only here because I drew the short straw. I sure as hell don’t wanna spend a whole day with a rich bastard like you.” Gavin says. Elijah isn’t surprised. Most people view him as such. The media tells them to. _

_ “I’ll try not to be too much trouble then.” Elijah says.  _

_ Gavin gestures toward the door, signifying that it’s time to go to the meetup with Jericho. _

~

Hanahaki’s disease: wherein a person experiencing unrequited love begins to grow a plant in their lungs, causing them to cough up the petals.

This isn’t an unusual thing. 

It’s only unusual that it’s happening to him.

Elijah has never fallen in love before. He wasn’t even sure he ever would. He didn’t like people. He didn’t like the idea of having to hear another person talk about themselves while he’s required to listen and pretend to care.

But here he is, only a month after meeting someone, coughing up petals in a bathroom for him. He’s coughing up petals and covering his hands in blood. And now everyone knows. 

The bathroom door opens and Elijah turns away, hiding his face and hiding his petals.

“Oh, Elijah…” Comes Connor’s concerned voice. Elijah hears the android’s footsteps come closer and feels the hand on his shoulder. He shakes his head and straightens up, once more tossing the petals away and washing the blood off his hands. He uses his sleeve to dry his eyes and face and turns to face Connor.

“I’m going to head home now. Excuse me, Connor.” Elijah says, walking around him to the door. 

“You have to do something about it, Elijah. You can’t just avoid this like you do the rest of your problems.” Connor calls after him. Elijah stops at the door and turns back to look at him once more.

“Don’t you have important Jericho things to tend to with Markus instead of hounding me?” Elijah snaps.

“I’m worried about you.”

“Well don’t.”

“Eli-”

“I said don’t. Whatever you’re going to say I don’t want to hear it.”

Elijah turns and exits the bathroom before Connor can say anything. All he has to do is get home without the press hounding him on his way out of the building.

What a miracle that would be.

~

_ “You saved my life, Gavin. Just accept the gift!” Elijah says. _

_ “I saved your life because it’s my job! Not because I like you!” Gavin snaps. _

_ “You don’t have to like me. You just have to accept the gift.” Elijah replies. _

_ Gavin sighs and lays his head back down on the pillow. For a moment the only sound is the steady beeping of the heart monitor. Elijah doesn’t like seeing him like this. It was supposed to be him. Those bullets were meant for him. But Gavin took them for him. Yeah, it’s his job to keep Elijah safe but… _

_ Not to that extent. _

_ “Why did you come here? Just to give me your stupid gift?” Gavin asks, glaring at him. _

_ “Because I wanted to see you. Because I was worried about you.” Elijah admits. _

_ “‘Worried’ about me?” _

_ “Yeah.” _

_ “You don’t even know me.” _

_ “I’d like to.” _

_ Gavin sighs. It’s long and drawn out, emphasizing his exasperation. _

_ “Fine.” _

~

At home, he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about catching the petals. He doesn’t care about the blood. He doesn’t care about his tears.

There’s piles of petals coated in blood in all of his most lived in rooms. The most is in his bedroom. He often wakes at night in a cold sweat, hacking up flowers until he can breathe again.

He doesn’t know how much time he has left. He knows he should get the surgery. But he doesn’t want his feelings for Gavin to disappear. He enjoys the warm feeling he gets when he sees or thinks about Gavin. He enjoys the butterflies he gets when Gavin smiles or laughs.

It’s the most he’s ever felt for anyone. It’s the warmest he’s ever felt. He can’t go back to the way he felt before. Numb. Empty. Unfeeling.

Cold.

No…

He’d rather suffocate to death than go back.

~

_ Gavin’s laughter fills the room. Elijah had told a joke, at least he thinks he did. In truth he doesn’t remember why Gavin is laughing. He’s just focused on the fact that he is.  _

_ And how beautiful he looks when he does. _

_ “You’re not as bad as I thought you’d be, you know.” Gavin says once his laughter subsides and he catches his breath. _

_ Elijah smiles in response, his heart fluttering a little. _

_ “You’re not as much of a dick as I thought you were.” Elijah replies, smirking at him. _

_ Gavin elbows his arm and Elijah laughs. _

_ Getting to know Gavin has been Elijah’s best decision and worst mistake. He’s never had a friend like Gavin, who just shows up out of nowhere with takeout and bad movies. He’s never had anyone make him laugh or smile like Gavin. He’s never felt so protective or worried about someone like he does while Gavin is working. _

_ But he’s started coughing up blood and pieces of flower petals in the last week. He knows what’s coming. He knows it only gets worse. He knows that his feelings for Gavin will be his undoing.  _

_ He just can’t bring himself to care. _

~

“I don’t want to talk about it, if that’s what you’re here for.” Elijah says. Gavin pushes passed him and walks into the house. Elijah rolls his eyes and closes the door. “Ah yes, what I clearly meant by that was ‘come on in Gavin.’ How silly of me.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me? I thought we were friends?” Gavin says, hurt written all over his face.

“We are! I just… I’m not good at talking about things like this!” Elijah says, putting his hands up in defense.

“So who is it then?” Gavin asks. Elijah feels his heart trip over itself.

“I- uh- well-” Elijah stammers.

“Do you even know?” Gavin asks.

“Of course I do! I think I’d know my own emotions, thank you.” Elijah says.

“Have you told them?”

“No.”

“Why not?! It’s clearly gotten bad!” 

“Because I don’t need to tell them to know that they don’t want me.”

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?”

Elijah stops and thinks for a moment. He’s cornered himself and he needs to get out.

“I’m not exactly easy to get along with. I wouldn’t want me.” He says.

“Shut the fuck up. Anyone would be lucky to have you.” Gavin counters. Elijah feels his heart swell, if only for a moment.

“Oh.” Is all he can say.

“Are you going to get the surgery?” 

“No…”

“Elijah, you have to! You’ll die!”

“I don’t care! I don’t want those feelings taken from me!”

“Elijah, seriously! You have to!” Gavin pleads, walking up to him and grabbing his shoulders.

“It’s my life, Gavin. You aren’t going to convince me otherwise.” Elijah says, wrenching himself free from Gavin’s grasp.

“You’re a selfish bastard, you know that? There are other people in the world that care about you.” Gavin yells.

“Yeah?! Like who?! Name three!” Elijah snaps.

“Connor! Your fuckin’ Chloe. Me! I care about you! Why the fuck do you think I’m here?!” Gavin yells.

“And you’ll all be fine without me! Better probably! I’m not getting rid of those feelings, Gavin. It’s the first time I’ve ever felt so warm! I just… I don’t want to lose that! I’d rather die warm than live cold!” Elijah yells back.

“Elijah… I’m not just gonna stick around and watch you throw your life away like this. You’re my friend and… I can’t just watch you do this. Please. Do something about it.” Gavin says, voice much softer than before.

“I… I can’t. And I won’t. I’m sorry.” Elijah says, his heart shattering at the broken look on Gavin’s face.

“At least tell me who. Who in the world is worth this? Who could possibly be worth all this pain and suffering?” Gavin asks, looking defeated. 

He has to.

He has to tell him.

“You are. You are worth everything.”

~

_ Everything seemed to revolve around him. Everything Elijah did and everywhere he went he was for or with Gavin. He’s subconsciously devoted himself to a man that he hasn’t even known long. _

_ Not that he’s complaining. They’ve had tons of fun together. Movies, a road trip, fireworks.  _

_ But his lungs are rapidly filling with petals. He finds himself slowing down with each passing day. Gavin’s pointed it out once or twice but Elijah waved his concerns away, stating he wasn’t sleeping well. _

_ Which isn’t a lie. He’s not been sleeping well. He’s been choking on flower petals instead of peacefully sleeping. _

_ He feels his time is coming to an end. He’ll lose his life. He’ll lose everything. _

_ But he won’t lose his feelings for Gavin. He won’t lose his warmth. _

_ He’ll take those to the grave with him. _

~

“Me…?” Gavin asks, shocked.

“Who else?” Elijah replies.

“Elijah… you have to get the surgery.” Gavin says quietly, turning his head away from him. Elijah’s heart shatters. Gavin doesn’t feel the same, just like he knew would happen.

“I don’t want to, Gavin…” Elijah says.

“No, you don’t understand. You have to.” Gavin says, looking up into his eyes. “I got the surgery because of my feelings for you.”

No…

NOW Elijah’s heart shatters.

“No… no no no… Gavin…” Elijah says, unable to form a sentence.

“Come on, Elijah… I’ll drive you.” Gavin says, hanging his head and heading for the door.

Elijah was too late…

He’s already lost everything.


End file.
